What’s a hockey widow, ask you? Well, it’s the significant other (male or female) of a beer league hockey player. Said hockey widow (or widower. For this instance, let’s say widow. No particular reason) spends several nights a week at home alone while said hockey player races around a local rink for an hour or so, then spends another hour or so drinking beer in the locker room discussing topics of the day such as political unrest in the Ukraine, the probability of civic unity on the Edmonton downtown airport closure and whether or not Stephen Harper gets his sweater vests custom-made.
Okay, disclaimer: I have never actually been present in the locker room for any of these discussions, so I had to use my imagination a little bit on the topics. But I think I got it pretty close.
As you might imagine, there are plenty of downsides to being a hockey widow, such as:
- being the only one around to let the dog in and out;
- having to pour your own wine;
- not having anyone to blame when you wake up the next morning and none of the dishes have been done;
- listening to your hockey spouse spin yarns about how he got slew-footed the other night just like Taylor Hall did that one game. It’s pretty much the same thing, you guys; and
- having to look at your hockey spouse’s ghastly wounds and scars from that time he got slew-footed just like Taylor Hall.
But it’s not all bad. When you think about it, there are actually a lot of upsides to hockey widow-hood, such as:
- getting to watch Love Actually without someone sitting next to you huffing about how Colin Firth isn’t that charming, or how Hugh Grant’s adorable awkwardness is highly overrated;
- obviously never doing this dance alone in your living room;
- being able to shop online without having to hide the fact that you’re typing in your credit card information or justify buying two pairs of shoes on a buy one get one free sale. Buy one get one free; and
- getting to eat whatever you want for dinner – like Wheat Thins and this dip.
This dip is actually this dip, and I haven’t really changed the recipe at all because it’s perfect and I love it.
In addition to making it for myself when I’m alone watching Love Actually without shame, I also make it whenever I get together with other hockey widows, or even just regular people who don’t know what getting slew-footed means (I don’t).
I have been told there is another peculiar creature called the “football widow.” If you are one of those, you might consider making this dip for next weekend’s Super game.
Spicy White Bean Dip from Never Enough Thyme
- 3 tbsp olive or canola oil, divided
- 1 small onion
- 4 (or more) cloves garlic
- 1 15-ounce can little white beans (also called Navy beans because that makes total sense), drained and rinsed
- Juice of one lemon, or 3 tbsp bottled lemon juice
- 1 1/2 tsp fresh rosemary, finely chopped, or 1 tsp dried
- 1/2 tsp salt
- 1/4 tsp cayenne pepper
- 1/4 tsp red pepper flakes
Place a skillet over medium heat and heat one tablespoon oil. Cut onion into quarters and place in food processor along with garlic. Chop roughly and add to skillet. Fry until onion is softened, but not brown. Your garlic won’t be chopped that finely so it shouldn’t burn, but keep an eye on it.
Transfer onion and garlic back to food processor along with beans, lemon juice, rosemary, salt, cayenne pepper and red pepper flakes. Process until smooth, adding remaining one to two tablespoons oil through the feed tube.
Serve with your preferred crackers or veggies while you watch your favourite movie uninterrupted, except for having to let the dog in and out every 15 minutes.